Canada's Next Top Model, Season Two, Episode Six

As usual, thanks to the uberfantasmic Steph for the shownotes!

Starting with a bang the girls are sent on go-sees, making their home base at Sutherland Models. Because there are five of them they draw straws to see who will go on their own and who will go in pairs. Rebecca gets the short straw and one less hour; the pairs are Cori and Tara, and Tia and Sinead. Things go reasonably well for most of the afternoon. That said, Tara is deemed too tall for runway, something I haven't heard before. Cori is called a "B model" at one appointment and "the prettiest girl in Sudbury" at another, which is a backhanded compliment at best. Cori learns how to hail a cab; next week she'll try out escalators.

The kicker comes when Rebecca learns that she didn't have to do all the appointments in the order they were laid out for her, i.e., A, B, C, etc. Understandably, she was plodding through the alphabet front to back. I blame Jay and his instructions, or lack of them. In order to not be late (or disqualified) she bolts back to the studio and misses two designers. It could be worse – Cori couldn't remember what time she had to be back at all. The prize is a $5000 diamond ring from Birks Jewellers. Jay adds up some sort of scoring from the designers to decide the rankings. Rebecca comes in last, and Jay is hard on her about missing the appointments, ignoring his own complicity. Tia is next, then Tara and Sinead and ultimately Cori gets the bling. How this happens considering the designer's comments is beyond me. Tara, of course, points out that Cori couldn't have made it to even one appointment without her help, and she's pissed off AGAIN.

The house scenes the editors play up this week highlight Cori's wishy-washy-ness. Everyone thinks she's ready to 'sell her soul' to Jay to win CNTM. She puts on her best television face, she has split personality between onscreen and off, she sucks up at judging, etc. What she needs is to ditch her whiny crying Rene Zellweger lemon face.

The shoot this week takes place in Toronto's Distillery District, where they will do a fake ad for the LG Chocolate Phone, and the photographer is going to be Nigel Barker! Ooooooh!!! Aaaaaaah!!! The theme is Bond Girl secret operative with lingerie, trench coats and big dogs. Tia comes out smokin', in control of her garter, the phone and the dog. Sinead is more gangly than sexy. When Tara had the dog she didn't have the phone; when she had the phone she didn't have the hair. Cori couldn't walk the dog to save her life; she was too flustered by Nigel being close by. In contrast, Rebecca's shoot got Nigel all worked up and excited – almost cartwheels. If he could have awarded the whole contest to her right then and there, he would have. It made me feel a little dirty, in a good way.

Nigel later takes the girls out for dinner. Cori thinks he's dreamy; she's so star struck it's sad. The idea of Indian food is freaking her out – she'd rather go to an "Eye-talian" restaurant. We also learn she's never had a cheeseburger in her life, because she doesn't like orange. Hmmmm. Part of me loved that Cori was freaked out, but part of me is peeved about the portrayal of Canadians as potatoes and gravy people. Hella-f*ckin-lo? Multiculturalism is our middle name up here.

The photos reveled at judging actually reflect what we saw in the video, for once. Or maybe the video did justice to the photos, or something. Tia's photo oozes smoldering sexiness, while Sinead looks confident but boney. Cori looked like she was going to cry in her photo, I can't imagine why... Tara is told she looks hesitant and has no presence, which makes the stone-hearted beeyatch break down into tears. Jay does some significant backpedaling about Rebecca's go-sees; maybe he got a talking-to. Her photo is stunning, just ask Nigel, who gushes that LG would probably use this photo in an actual campaign.

Now that everyone's emotions are all out of whack, the girls are asked to rat on each other and expose any misconceptions we might have about them. They go for the jugular and gang up on Cori, citing her tendency to brownnose when the judges are around. Cori wrings out, "I can't respond because sometimes when I'm upset I hyp-(sob)-er-(sob)-vent-(sob)-il-(sob)-ate." Ohmigawd, the list of things wrong with these girls continues to grow.

Judging is cryptic. The only things you can predict are that Rebecca is safe, and that Tara looks like a drag queen. The order is Rebecca, Sinead and then Cori, who's already/still crying. Maybe this was Jay's way of making it up to Rebecca after getting screwed on the go-sees. Despite Tia's fab photo, she is told that the camera doesn't capture what she brings in person. Tara doesn't have whatever it takes to be someone's muse… America's Next Top Inspiration? Gasp, both of them get a photo and no one needs to hightail it out of the house this week.

Next week: With two episodes left, a double elimination is a sure thing. Rebecca gets a surprise, and Cori has blackmail plans.